Quote of the week:
"some advice: when its late at night.... take the stairs"
-Mike Radja
And the postseason honors keep on coming Ladies and Hosers. Welcome to the 07-08 edition of the annual laundry list of madness. We absolutely guarantee that at least 50% of these moments of true genius may have been under the influence of alcohol. Lets get started
10. Hockey East Opener vs BU
Hockey East, meet James vanRiemsdyk. James vanRiemsdyk, Hockey East. He will be making you look foolish from time to time.
9. CC Weekend: Another team from Colorado comes to New England, and fails.
-I always thought playing against a team from the Rockies would be a little more..ya know rocky...John Denver really is full of shit
8. The Whiteout of the Whiteout: Success in spite of people who are not Hosers getting to the doors, Snoooowwww, ESPN, and the general foul stench of Mainers.
-The very least ESPN could've done to make it up to your heroes was to send Barry Melrose to the game. Really, everyone knows the Mullet gives him the power of flight so it's not like he needed a ride.
7. 07-08 Frozen Four: NoDak lays a Rocky Mountain Oyster and punishing the Cornell fan's liver.
-The Good Guys in Blue weren't there, but at least we got a laugh out of the sad failures that are Rockies fans who unknowingly were admitting their own futility to the Hosers of Red Sox Nation, and we at least made a Cornell fan feel our pain one force fed beer resulting from the single greatest game of Quarters ever played. And now we have evidence that there are in fact at least 5 jersey wearing Merrimack fans.
6. In Matthews Arena, only the Hosers seem to get IT.
-IT was the only really normal night in this season's series with the NUtered Huskies. After this night, IT went kinda backwards. But like every year, IT all went to hell for the NUtered ones. And for the record, this night did not have any tequila involved in IT.
5. Hosers in the middle of nowhere NoDak: We seriously have got to go the Volpe after this rink?!?
-Fine leather seats, marble floors, million dollar scoreboards, nazi undertones, laser shows, offensive nicknames, and NCAA lawsuits, just as Ralph Engelstead intended. Also, has anyone seen Darci's hat?
4. Lighting up the Dick Umile Scoreboard: Another night of greatness on Comm Ave.
Several of us Hosers were beginning to think it was Summer with all those beachball goals Bennet has become famous for. And Beancan U didn't even have the Beanpot to make them feel better this time around.
3. "Go BC Diving!": Actual message on the Conte Scoreboard during the clinching weekend vs BC
-What we learned from this weekend: BC douchebags constantly walking back and forth in front of you is their way of taunting. BC is going Emo. There are some 8x10's the Gerbe Baby wont autograph no matter how nicely you may ask. And repeating as regular season champs is a good thing.
2. Visiting the Alfond: Does Darci have to slap a Mainer?
Ben Bitch-op still seems to have recurring nightmares about Trevor Smith, so he decided that maybe passing Radja the puck and allowing him the open net was the 1st step towards healing. Though, not all our hopes were realized despite the nail-in-the coffin sweep on the Mainers. We did kinda hope the Mainers having a joke of a season would kinda force them to drastic measures to change their luck. Like taking a shower, dental care, or laying off watching Kentucky Derby highlights (or as they prefer to call it, Orono Porno). And Smokey McHoser finds the perfect Teddy Bear for every Mainer.
1. It's official, the Mainers are doomed for many many more years to come. The Hoser Child of the Future has arrived.
Nick and Erinn are now the proud parent's of a baby girl, and photos of the child are becoming more sought after than any photo of Brad and Angelina's weekly adoption. Neither Nick or Erinn would admit to it, but we already know the Hoser Child is already bench-pressing an ambulance.
That's all for now minions, stay tuned for further instructions, until next time, Goodnight Canada, and of course, as always,
Good day, Eh!
Rouge
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment