Sucks to %$#^ BU!!

Hoser's note: The quote of the week will be awarded upon conclusion of the weekend games, as will be the trend from now on. A lot of intellectual pieces of information can be said in one weekend by us Hosers you know!


Everyone watch your mother #%$&$^ language! The Boston $%#$ University D%$$# Poodles are in town! That's right Ladies and Hosers, the inaugural winners of The Hockey East Pottymouth School of the Year are bringing their foul mouth's to the Hoser-Dome!

Boston U has always had a soft spot in the heart of Hoser Nation, no it has nothing to do with them beating Maine in the 95 Frozen 4, nor does it have anything to do with their constant fixation on taunting BC even when they aren't playing them. One particular BU player will always have a home at the Hoser-Dome whether he wants to admit it or not. Mr. Ryan Whitney, the greatest BU defensemen in UNH history. Was it not for his tireless efforts to aid the good guy's in blue in the 2003 Hockey East Championship, who knows what ungodly apocalyptic world we would be in today. To this day, the Hosers continue to petition to have his number retired and raised to the rafters of the Hoser-Dome so that all can remember his greatness. But that is not all, oh no. After all, Boston University managed to grab the attention of the entire college hockey world for their foul mouths. So here in these scriptures. We officially recognize the Poodles of Boston University with the Official Pottymouth School of the Year Award. Congratulations on earning yourself an honor almost as low as Chris Bourque's GPA before he bolted for Canada!

On to the game. The game started out with an unusual site, one of the BU staff actually attempted to walk the treacherous water of Lake Whitt in high heels and a mini skirt. Many speculate she was the BU "massage specialist".She succeeded in crossing the waters somehow Most of Durham was terrified soon after that, as it appeared the end of the world was coming because the dead were walking among the living once again!!! Terror turned into confusion when the zombie in question began to whine profusely about insignificant things he had no control over. All the Hoser-Dome then groaned in agony as we realized that this was no zombie at all..... It was just Jack Parker.

This week, I took in the game from the West side of Lake Whitt (and got paid for it). Right from the start, everyone knew this would be a game that would look more like a prizefight. Unfortunately, I had to enjoy this prizefight while listening to the mindless yipping and profanity of BU Poodle fans. It was a sad sad thing, they continue to live in the delusion that they are always playing BC and cheered like it was so. Not that I don't appreciate some good mockery towards BC anytime.

The scoring went back and forth a few times late in the game with some pretty goals for the good guys in blue, and some hideous ones that make the average UML Puck Bunny look like Jessica Simpson. Some particularly nice goals from Mr. Fortney and of course his excellence, Matt " I eat success for breakfast with skim milk" Fornataro. That goal ultimately landed him on the list for those up being cannonized as Saints by the Vatican. Sadly, with a minute left and a penalty kill for UNH, the Poodles capitalized and tied the score late. With more idiocy from "faux fans" in the form of throwing garbage on the ice (that behavior is not a good thing, regardless of what some douche bag moron who dares to call himself a hockey fan but will not be named may think). With a penalty marred overtime, UNH's PK was tested strongly. Fortunately, they succeeded. Unfortunately, in the short time we spent at even strength were we unable to take the game, and we forced to settle for a tie. Against a strong BU club, It could have been a lot worse. Despite some gaffs here and there, the good guys in blue fought very hard and played a very gritty game against this physical Poodle team. Unfortunately, Hoser Nation's hopes of seeing the Ghost of Ryan Whitney possess an unfortunate BU player to further aid us Hoser's were dashed. But he will soon come back to haunt them, soon he will.

Sunday approaches Hosers, be sure to pack a sense of class, an ability to date within your own species and outside the family tree and brush your teeth, because none of the above are found where we are heading. The Societal Abyss that is Orono awaits us. Until then as always.

Good day, eh!
Rouge