"it is impossible to describe the low life class level of a mainer while lookin through the eyes of a hoser, how ever if u were to look up in a hoser dictionary; that person would be described as a horse fornicating, child stalking, waste of inbred space that needs to be wiped clean of the earth by means of dipped in an acid bath filled with piranha.......or something like that"
-The great Hoser philosophizer-Marcel Von HoseHead (still alive, still hates Maine, still killing NESN)
Well it's finally that time of the year once again ladies and Hosers. That whimsical time of the year where we "entertain" that lovable group of backwoods retards and lifelong failures of humanity better known as the Mainers. They bring with them incest, bestiality, a complete absence of intelligence, a stench of scUMbag, and constant unoriginal ramblings that no one can understand due to their lack of teeth and/or other evolutionary related shortcomings.
This is always a time of great amusement for all your heroes, for we always strongly condone and recommend the complete marginalization and humiliation of the ScUM of the Earth. Now of course you can get a good laugh from the annual flame fest going on as several of our Hoser brethren and fellow UNH faithful "communicate" our thoughts to these inbred failures. And of course when Lake Whittemore is in full Whiteout regalia, the Mainers will certainly hear the voice of Hoser Nation.
Did you really think I was going to let the Orono trash go without a pre-whiteout lecture on their inferiority? So here we go with another Hoser Nation Top 10 list. The Top 10 reasons why Its better to be UNH blue than Mainer pussy blue and screwed.
10. There aren't too many disgraces worse in this world than being the piece of crap that Massachusetts dumped and flushed away (credit to Godfather for this one)
9. UNH has one of the best Engineering Schools around...This is the kinda work Mainer Engineering gets ya
8. To Mainers, any Budweiser commercial featuring the famed Clydesdale Horses is considered to be free soft-core porn
7. UNH Alums can look forward to bright futures and happy homes, the only future a Mainer alum can look forward to is finally finding a Wal-Mart Parking lot close to Horse Stables to park the trailer in and call that home. And those are the lucky ones
6. Lets compare residence halls shall we? Lets see a UNH Residence Hall vs a Mainer "University" residence hall.
5. While the Good Guys in Blue have their classic and sharp uniform style, the Mainers have decided to go for a new set of uni's that more accurately depict their off-ice "contributions" in recent years.
4. Much of New England reveres and respects their baseball team (see Red Sox AKA America's Team). Mainers just beat up their own baseball team
3. The Mainers have spent some quality time in the cellar this year...just not the same Cellar Keith Johnson and Tanner House were hoping to lead their respective women of choice into.
2. Dental Plans...We got them, Mainers lack the minimum amount of teeth to qualify.
1.Mainers like to talk about 93* and 99. With 96 NCAA Violations, Drug Dealers, Child Predators, and other Mainer players getting arrested for sexual assault related charges, somebody must have forgotten to talk to them about having some integrity.
And in case all that didn't sink in for ya. This really does say it all. And it says to me, even if only for a brief moment.
EVEN COACH WALSH FIGURED IT OUT!!!!
Thats all that really needs to be said for now, plenty more will be said Sunday. Be ready Ladies and Hosers, the struggle between good and evil rages on this weekend! Goodnight Canada, and of course,
Good day, Eh!
Rouge
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